Dear GC Readers,
I’m in my thirties and married with one child. I have to confess that I’m in love with my best friend’s wife. I told her how I feel sometime ago and she also starting to move closer to me. We used to talk for hours every day and we’ve kissed each other few times.
Suddenly I don’t know what has happened as she has started ignoring me by not replying my messages and calls. When ever she speaks to me she says that she’s not ignoring me. Now because of this am not able to concentrate on my work as well as spend quality time with my family.
Now that I have decided to come out of this situation, I’m always thinking about her. I can’t forget about her and she is always on my mind. Please advice how I can get out of this.
She is also my wife’s friend and she comes with her husband to our place regularly and we do go out as group at least once in week.
Please advise me as I need to come out of this ASAP or I may become mad…
I want to believe that part of the angst you are feeling is because she appears to have made a decision to move on. So I am not surprised you feel you are ‘loosing it’. We always want what we can’t have, that is a fact. You are anxious because she has moved on.
I would urge you strongly to stand back from your situation and be honest with the situation and to yourself. What you need to ask yourself is what you yourself would say to a friend in the same situation.
What is all this really all about? Was the affair because of lust? Curiosity? Dissatisfaction in your own marriage? Figure this out so you know why it bothers you so much that she has ended the affair.
From what you are saying, your family must mean something to you as you say you are trying to spend quality time with them. However, affairs always end up out in the open at some point no matter how long it takes to come out. You are putting this time with your family at risk with this affair.
In all honesty I would say this woman you were seeing has made a conscious decision to stop the affair and move on. The more you push her for answers the less regard she will have for you. She has no obligation to explain anything that is what she owes to her family.
My advice to you is to take pride in what you already have. The nature of your relations with your friends’ wife cannot lead no where satisfying for either of you. If she suddenly decides to start talking to u again it’s probably just to see how high you jump when she says ‘jump’. So once again take pride.
Best of luck.
Ms. A.K from GC XXX
Send all your relationship & Love probs to me via firstname.lastname@example.org
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