Last week my friend Aisha called me up out of the blue.
We hadn’t seen each other in a long time and since I wasn’t busy, we quickly decided to catch up at a restaurant in the heart of Accra. We ended up meeting three other ladies we knew from high school there so we sat at the same table….after exchanging pleasantries, we cooed about clothes, jewelry, weddings, work and finally the boyfriends!
I love my friends so much as they are intelligent and outspoken young women, and all of us are hot potatoes in every right. I am going to give you the full gist about the scoop on our boyfriends past, paast, paaast, paaaast and present. LOL.
When it comes to the subject of dating, many are the issues and varying personalities, the yardsticks and the distortions, the looks that make us go crazy and the idiosyncrasies behind each and every look!
Kindly bear in mind that I use ugly here, not as an insult to the average looking Joe, but as an adjective strong enough to carry home my point. Also, you may find situations that counter our opinion but remember we are using the majority sample and not the minority.
Now I must say, and you can choose to judge us or laugh along with us but between us 5 ladies, close to a hundred men had waltzed through our lives in one way or the other –Casual s*x, Serious relationships, crushes, flirting…name it- so yes, we knew exactly what we were saying.
Now we dwelled mainly on why we would date an ugly man any day instead of a hunk.
Most of the ugly men we had all come across were studious, intelligent and financially stable…They worked hard and made sure they held their place firmly in society.
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They also know how to treat a woman right because they appreciate the jewel they have, they literally threw diamonds at our feet. Begging to date us and offer us the world but in the past, because we were rather ignorant, we preferred the good looking men who we realized soon enough were inherently lazy, broke, pompous, rude, cheats and very arrogant.
The handsome men believe they are so hot, women they date should be the ones chasing and pampering them and appreciating the fact that they are dating them in the first place.
They won’t pull their weight in the relationship, Some of them think a woman should be so happy to date them; they should go as far as taking care of him. And this was confirmed when we placed a call to a hot, mutual male friend who emphatically stated that he would not take care of a woman he is dating because there are many women out there offering to take care of him so he can date them.
My issue was, young man, the woman dating you also has many men after her so should she also succumb to the men who want to take good care of her instead of dating you? No, he said. She is a prostitute or a gold-digger if she does that! Wow, men, such double standards!
Now ladies, why date a man who prefers you pampering him to him pampering you? Why date the annoying, stingy, beau instead of the ugly guy in the corner who is willing to give you the world?
One of my friends told us how she once endured a horrible relationship just because she was dating a hot young man and felt she was lucky to be with him because many people were jealous of her…SAD life!
Is the fact that you scored with the man all women are chasing exciting enough to hold on to above all else and put up with a bum?
Well, what’s important is that she has learned from this experience so much that she will never repeat such buffoonery.
Why do people exalt handsome men so much that they hold their partners to emotional ransom?
Just then, a woman in a tight blue dress walked by with a banging body and the face of an angel. This woman was so good looking even us ladies had to say so.
And she walked to the next table and sat with who?! … A boyfriend (we all agreed) who didn’t really have the looks to deserve such a beauty. We immediately burst out laughing.
What was so special about him?
Somebody mentioned the cash….and one of my friends giggle and said he probably has a big ‘load’. This brings us to another point…
Although I already mentioned that yes, most ugly men work so hard they have a financial edge over their other counterparts; it is not the only reason why sensible beautiful women will go for an ugly man. Most ugly men give HOT Bang! This is from experience…
Yes they do. Believe it or not, most ugly men get down really good! They know their shortfalls and are eager to please. So they dedicate so much time and gentleness to taking you to heaven before they even begin to think about themselves. Big ‘load’ or not, he knows how to use his thing!
As long as people keep saying and thinking that beautiful women date ugly men because of their money, they will always miss the real issues and their minds will be too blocked to land any beautiful women. Don’t make unnecessary assumptions where women are concerned…
A lot goes into our choices of partners and yes, the ugly men seem to come on top with a lot of traits that combine to blow us away!
I remember reading some comments on a picture of Menaye and Muntari on this blog-GhanaCelebrities.Com, and also on Jackie’s husband. I was weak from the ignorant remarks of many contributors who classified these men as ugly men…
Honestly, Muntari is one of the few Ghanaian men I have always had a crush on…he sizzles! And if he hadn’t married Menaye whom I respect very much, when he did, I would have been hot on his heels. 😀
Let me say that, it is the whole package, emotional and mental connection, attention, honestly, care, personality, stability…
So if you are an average looking man, please don’t despair. Walk up to a beautiful woman and start a decent, respectable process of wooing her.
And if you disagree with me, please feel free to share your unbiased and honest personal experience.