Last week, I watched one of my favorite movies of all time, “ The Best man” for the one thousand and one times with a couple of my male friends.
I remember vividly this particular scene where the four friends, Lance( Morris Chestnut) , Murch ( Harold Perrineau) , Quentin ( Terrence Howard, my favorite character in the movie) and Harper ( Taye Diggs ,the best man) suddenly started a discourse on marriage.
I thought the discussion was rather profound and edifying. I hadn’t seen guys get personal and real like that in a while. (Funny you won’t get Ghanaian guys engaged in such a discussion, they will rather engage in football talk than“useless” talk like this. It is not one of their favorite things to discuss really).
One line in the discourse which caught my attention was the “Marriage is a cure to promiscuity” phrase uttered by Lance. And so I asked myself “Is marriage a cure to promiscuity?” but I guess that wasn’t enough because I wanted to hear the candid opinions of my male friends with me, at least that way I could get a general overview of what African men thought about this assertion.
One of my male friends, a well-known playboy in “the game” held overtly and strongly that marriage was going to curb him from his promiscuous life. But oh, I forgot that was a play boy’s point of view. So when I realized I had just made a mistake, I proceeded to ask the others and I couldn’t believe that they said the same.
PROMISCUITY has rapidly gained roots in our society. It has become a way of having fun especially among men.
According to most men I know, it is a way of ‘testing water and surfing grounds’. The African man sees promiscuity as tasting different kinds of soup and knowing which one appeals most to his stomach.
Some say it is the changing of shirts to find the most suitable one. Many men out there believe that at the time they say their vows, they are automatically curbed of promiscuity. Is marriage really a cure for promiscuity as many African and African American men believe?
Seriously, is that really possible when we all know that promiscuity is a habit? Do you believe a man who takes pride in sleeping with women will suddenly stop after he has married?