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OBS: Finally, A New Study Explains Why SORRY Is The Hardest Word To Say

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If you find it hard to say SORRY, do not worry since you are not alone….A study into why people like you find it to say ‘SORRY’ has revealed that refusing to apologise is good for our self-esteem and that is why uttering the ‘S word’ can prove so difficult.

According to the  new Australian study, while apologising can lessen feelings of guilt and help restore a wrongdoer’s image, it seems declining to do so can have even more powerful psychological benefits.

According to the new Australian study, refusing to apologise is good for our self-esteem and that is why uttering the ‘S word’ can prove so difficult.

Read below for more…(Via DailyMail)

What The Word Apology Means?

The word apology is derived from Greek apologia – meaning a defence or an explanation – and the issue of when to apologise is one that has always vexed humans.

Plato’s Apology, ostensibly the text of the speech his teacher, the great Greek philosopher Socrates, gave in his defence at his trial for corrupting the youth of Athens, maintains this classical meaning of the word.

However, apology in the modern sense has come to mean an admission of wrongdoing, with none of the defensive implications of its etymological root.

Why The Research & How Was It Done?

Lead author Dr Tyler Okimoto, of the University of Queensland Business School, wanted to find out why people often refuse to say sorry despite apologies being seen as a ‘cheap’ way to reduce blame and punishment.

His findings, published in the European Journal of Social Psychology, come from two experiments.

The first involved 228 adults aged from 18 to 77. Some were asked to think about a time they had upset someone and apologised, others a time when they upset someone and refused to apologise and others a time when they upset someone and neither said sorry nor refused to.

Participants who had refused to apologise reported having felt greater power and greater levels of self-esteem than those who had made an apology.

Compared with having done nothing, having apologised also boosted self-esteem somewhat – but refusing to say sorry had a more powerful benefit on self-worth.

A second experiment involved 219 people aged from 18 to 71. A third wrote an email apologising to someone for something they had done wrong in real life, another third wrote an email refusing to apologise and the final group had to think about something they had done wrong but did not write anything.

People who refused to apologise felt significantly greater self-esteem afterwards than those who had not written an email.

But those who had made an apology did not.

Dr Okimoto and colleagues wrote that the benefits people felt from refusing to say sorry ‘appeared to trump any potential negative effect on self-esteem resulting from the defence of harmful actions.’

They added: ‘Taken together, the results of these two studies provide converging evidence that there can be beneficial psychological consequences for individuals who refuse to provide an apology to the victims of their harmful actions.’

The team concluded that the findings could help explain ‘seemingly irrational, antisocial, or callous behaviour’ displayed by wrongdoers and suggested further research to look at whether the apparent benefits of refusing to say sorry lasted in the long-term.



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4 thoughts on “OBS: Finally, A New Study Explains Why SORRY Is The Hardest Word To Say”

  1. The real problem here is that people have forgotten what “I’m sorry” is supposed to mean. You say I’m sorry because you’ve hurt someone’s feelings, not necessarily because you are wrong, or to blame for the argument. We have all forgotten that just because we can have different opinions, doesn’t mean we can’t respect one another. The appropriate thing to do here is say “I’m sorry I said something that made you upset. I still stand by my position, though, and hope you can respect that.”

    Reply
    • @Dr.miyagi, as much as I agree with your statement, rule #1 of apologising, NEVER EVER say “I’m sorry I said something that made you upset” because it’s not really an apology but more like a way to shut the person up or just for apologising sake. I read about that somewhere I don’t remember but apparently the best way to say it is, “I’m sorry I offended you” or something along those lines.

      Reply
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    Reply

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