Almost always, whenever you start talking to a new guy, you are bound to be asked this dreaded question-‘ How many guys have you been with’? Now ladies, even though this might appear as a harmless question, any guy that asks that is looking to form certain kind of impression about you depending on your answer.

Now if you are not yet sexually active, then you are in the clear and you have nothing to worry about. This is because what the guy actually wants  is the number of guys you have been involved with sexually.

Now here comes the tricky part. Let me first start by making some informed assumptions. Let’s say like the average woman, you started having sex at the age of 18 with the first guy you fell in love with. After dating for 2 years you realised he has changed from the sweet loving guy you knew to a cold hearted person. At 20, you are a single lady looking to mingle. You have a couple of flings with some guys you were attracted to. None of it led to a committed relationship but you had sex with at least one of these guys.

Then you meet your prince charming and start another relationship with him. Six (6) months later, you realise your prince charming is not so charming after all. He is a liar and a cheat. Now at 21 you are ready for something serious. You decide to stay off guys for some time. After a one year hiatus, you meet the perfect gentleman for you. Your start off a relationship with him and it lasts for 4 years.  Unfortunately it didn’t lead to marriage as you hoped and you are now 26 years looking for a serious relationship.

In this scenario, you must have slept with at least 5 guys. And that is a really conservative figure for today’s women. Now you meet a responsible guy who seems really interested in you. Before things start getting serious he asks you: ‘How many guys have you been with’? Do you go all out and be truthful with the actual figure? Or you employ your mathematical skills and do some division and subtraction?

For me, I have come to the realisation that no matter what you tell guys these days; they are bound to add a couple of numbers to it. Tell them you’ve been with 3 different guys and in their heads they are counting 6. The best is to simply ignore any such questions especially at the early stages of a relationship.

To me I don’t even know what guys want to do with that piece of information. If you like me, you should be able to embrace everything that comes with me, and asking about my past sexual relationships should only be an avenue to know me better and not to judge me.

Unfortunately the numbers of guys you have slept with are huge deal breakers for some guys. They may not admit to you, but the moment they realise you have a high score, they switch off the serious button in their heads.

So guys I want to know, does the numbers really count in this situation? What number is considered as decent by you guys? How would you feel if a girl also judges by your scores?

Ladies, do you always give out the real numbers? Have you ever lied about the number of guys you have slept with?