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Love & Relationship

Dear GC Readers, I Am Due to Marry Next Month But I Am into Women

lesbians kissing

 

I am a Ghanaian in my late 20s, living in Europe (I prefer not to mention my country for obvious reasons). I have been living here since a teenager and have had 5 lesbian relationships which I have enjoyed more than the 2 heterosexual relationships I have had.

Families back home have performed the needed custom and I am due to have a church wedding next month to marry my male partner (he is the second man I have been with) but my problem is, I really love being with other women.

I had no choice than to say ‘YES’ when I met my soon to be husband because everyone kept bothering me about being single for too long at church. Because they did not know me as they thought and the pressure was getting too much for me to bear.

My girlfriend at the time who was younger than me agreed that at my age, all eyes will be on me so I should go ahead and have a male relationship which we keep our female-female affair on a low profile.

That was few years ago and today, I am about to be married to a man knowing that he cannot really satisfy me and make me that happy but it seems I have no choice.

I have had sleepless nights since the day he proposed and with the date getting closer; I am getting more confused as to what to do.

I have thought about relocating to another European country, that is run out of the marriage or say I have lost interest but the problem is my male partner has not done anything on which I can stand.

The days are going fast and I don’t even know what to do so I am writing to see if anyone can help with an advice worth paying attention to.

This is my situation, please what should I do?

Editor’s note: This letter was really long (most parts irrelevant) so we had to cut it down.

From: A . S/ Europe

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5 thoughts on “Dear GC Readers, I Am Due to Marry Next Month But I Am into Women”

  1. 1 ) you can’t run away from the country because someone will eventually run into you whatever you go into hiding.(less you want to do a Sadam Hussain and hide in a cave)

    2) You have to come out to your family (easier said than done when it comes to elderly african relations) but it’s pressure off you

    3) The only thing you can do now is to mess up so bad that he calls the wedding off himself. Cos the longer this drags the deeper the hurt when he finds out and he deserves to know

    Reply
  2. Why dont you come out? If you really believe you are more happy with a woman then why do you have to deceive that guy, making him believe that he satisfy you sexually?
    I guess you have been cheating on him with your female partner but its so wrong to continue cheating after you say those marriage vows.

    Please dont marry him if you know you cant keep your marriage vows and most importantlly, if you know you love being with a woman than a man.

    Reply
  3. Dear A.S, as a bisexual woman, my advice to you will be to call off your wedding. I have no idea whether you’re a lesbian (only into women) or bisexual (into both men & women) but I know that whatever you are, it’s never fair to marry someone you don’t love since it’ll lead both you & him into misery. Just be true to yourself. Call off the wedding. Be honest & tell him that you don’t love him & so this won’t work. You need to find courage to do this. If you marry someone you don’t love, both of you will spend your lives in misery. You don’t need to come out to your family yet if you’re not ready, what’s important now is for you to call off this wedding NOW. Then take time & figure out what you want (whether to be with a man or woman ) & do it. Much love to you.

    Reply
  4. its not what you think. being into females like you its the work of the devil. see your pastor and pray over this to break this relationship you have with other women for ADAM AND EVE were not 2 females.

    Reply
  5. Why go put yourself into something that won’t take you far and am talking about leading the poor guy into thinking you love him.
    Am not going to talk about ur preference in gender becausee it disgusts me & yes u asked for an advice so I guess everyone has to keep it real with u.
    Anyways, Am more concerned about the poor guy you are leading astray.Tell him the truth & let him deal with it now than wait till it’s too late.I pray He gets over U as soon as u tell him so u both can live ur happy lives.

    Reply

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