THE BIG QUESTION: Is ‘Relationship Ghosting’ Acceptable? | Share You Experience & Let’s Get Talking

3 min


Black Woman-Ghosted On
Black Woman-Ghosted On

This is a must have conversation so I have decided to lead it—and I will open the door by explaining what relationship ghosting is (at least, to the best of my knowledge).

If you’ve experienced it before, then you surely know what ‘ghosting’ means—and if you’ve ghosted on someone before, then I don’t need to explain this to you. But for those who have not been on any side of the coin, let me give you the explanation so you can join the discussion.

Relationship ghosting is breaking up by disappearance—it has become a common breakup tactic, where out of the blue, a person you are in a relationship disappears or cuts contact.

Also, a date or someone failing to turn up for a relationship meet up, be it a first date or second and never bothering to return your calls to explain what happened is loosely termed ‘ghosting’.

Some think this tactic is deeply rude and others say, it is pretty acceptable.  To a large group of people, this becomes necessary sometimes while others see it as cowardly and immature.

And to set the ball rolling, let me tell you my own story—how my so called boyfriend of six months ‘ghosted’ on me. I was devastated but I am glad I put myself together to be able to talk about this experience today.

To me at the time, everything was great and even though we did not live far from each other on campus, he spent the last two weeks at my apartment. This made me think we were getting really serious.

We were studying different subjects, so one morning, he picked his bag and headed out for lectures as he always did. He kissed me goodbye and asked what was for lunch.

I did not hear from him again, only to find out that he had transfer to a different University in France, to study Agricultural Science—we were here in Germany and he was studying Media.

His friends couldn’t believe I did not know about any of these and that weekend, I called him several times on a number his best friend gave me—he did not answer. In fact, he picked the first call and pretended as though he could not hear me, then dropped the call.

I was heartbroken and could not understand why someone I considered mature will do this…

I have failed to turn up for a dinner with an old man (someone around my Dad’s age) who kept bothering me. Perhaps, that is ghosting too but I did it because it was necessary. I told him I was not interested and he kept pushing—so I said YES to his dinner, knowing I wouldn’t show up. He texted a few times later and when I failed to reply, he stopped.

So that is someone having ghosted on me—and perhaps, me having ghosted on someone too.

Now, let’s get talking…what do you think of ghosting? Have you ghosted on someone or been ghosted on? Share the experience with us…

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This reminds me of a story GhanaCelebrities.Com published yesterday about a man who seems to have ghosted on his wife of 12 years, with whom he has 3 kids—and another on the way. Interestingly, they considered this man a real ghost—making me, they’ve not heard of the ghosting tactic yet…



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4 Comments

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  1. Ghosting? Let me tell share my story. LOL

    I had a bf who was very demanding back then that was when I decided to try back a man after I broke up with my long term partner.

    This man did not respect any woman including his own mother and one day when he went to work, I picked my few stuff in his house, left his key under the mat and ghosted.

    Never picked his call again. I bumped into him a few weeks later and pretended like I did not even know him.

    It may be rude but sometimes you need it for your own sanity. I have since not ghosted on anyone since I have not had the need for it

  2. Thank God no one has ghosted on me yet but I don’t understand why some people will just disappear. Relationship is not by force so if you don’t want to be in it again, just tell the other person and move on. Is that not simple than ghosting?

    1. Right, say that again. lol. It isn’t by force to be in a relationship so if u know it ain’t working then quit, don’t just disappear

  3. I think ghosting IS very DISRESPECTFUL, COWARDLY, and IMMATURE… As a victim of two of them, i find it very hard to understand why someone will choose to treat a person they claim to ‘love’ that way. If u want out of a relationship, have enough respect for the person to say i want out..rather than leaving the victim ‘twisting’ in the wind; wondering what went wrong. I’m glad i picked myself up tho and picked certain lessons along with it. But in short, i have ABSOLUTELY NO RESPECT for ‘ghosters’. They fall extremely short of the phrase “real men”.