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Love & Relationship

Enjoy the Single Life: Being Alone Does Not Mean You’re Lonely

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People cannot distinguish between alone and lonely. They ‘think’ they’re lonely because they are alone and until they are in a relationship, life is at a standstill. That’s why many people endure very bad relationships because according to them, ‘I don’t want to be alone’, ‘I don’t want to be single’ – funny thing is they’re actually alone and lonely in the relationship but they don’t want to be single.

What we sometimes forget is when we can be in the same car with somebody but it doesn’t mean the person is riding with us. Having a companion is good but if there is none in sight, learn to be alone because it is necessary.

There is nothing wrong with someone acknowledging they are lonely and is interested in actively looking to make new friends/relationships but if you come across as someone who is unable to stand alone, it makes you very unattractive because you may come across as a needy person.

I revel in my solitude many times. I’ve no qualms going to places alone. I’m not going to miss out on anything just because I don’t get/have anyone to accompany me that’s why I find it funny when people say they can’t go to the movies alone – why should I have a companion before I watch a movie?

Haven’t you noticed that when you go places alone, you make more friends than when you have company? The downside is I got so comfortable I almost forgot how to be with people – I found myself wanting to be alone even when a ‘relationship’ is in sight.

If you don’t learn to be alone sometimes, or even revel in the single life, you’re not ready for and to be in a committed relationship because you’ll become an ‘energy vampire’ by sucking energy and pulling love out of others. A dependant relationship is not a healthy one unless it’s an interdependency one (they’re two different situations).

There are people whose relationship defines who they are as a person and they need it to exist. They need to be in a relationship to feel motivated to do anything in their life. They can’t go anywhere alone because without a companion they feel empty and helpless. You can’t be a person that needs the other people to tell you how to be – conform to what someone like.

If you fear being alone or you cannot enjoy your own company, you’ll endure bad company and bad relationships. Being coupled all the time is not going to take away your ‘loneliness’ because you can be in a relationship and STILL be lonely.

Being alone doesn’t mean you’re lonely. Loneliness is a state of mind. You shouldn’t only function when you’re surrounded with people or when in a relationship.

Have a ‘me time’ once in a while and rediscover who you are and the best time to do a rediscovery is when you’re alone. You have to get used to being alone if and when necessary



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