To say for lack of knowledge my people perish, will perhaps be too harsh a line to begin with but I cannot help but try to share my thoughts on this particular Ghanaian issue that seems to be well accepted and unquestioned by almost all.
Let us start by cutting long talk and going straight to the main question, why do we get married several times for one marriage in Ghana?
Ok that sounds like the wrong question. Sigh, this is confusing. It should be: Why do we have several marriage ceremonies to seal one marriage?
You see, when you copy and still want to be original, you end up making mockery of yourself, your culture, and your rationality.
What is a Ghanaian marriage? What is the singular most important ceremony and why do we never stop at one ceremony in Ghana and most African countries? But the western countries we copy spend less that we do on marriage and have just one ceremony.
We have our own marriage system which is the traditional. But it’s never enough. We go on to sign in court and do a white wedding to top up. At the end of all that, don’t we feel we have gotten married two or three times which all signify the same thing? Because traditional marriage is our marriage and we spend money on it but turn around and belittle it by calling it an engagement and then heading to the alter or church for another marriage ceremony which will cost double of the traditional marriage ceremony.
Why do we call our traditional marriage system a mere engagement when in actuality it is indeed our original marriage system?
I humbly ask to know who taught us to ridicule our culture and it’s significance and how did we all come to believe and hold on to such?
The traditional marriage as practiced is a necessary rite in all tribes in Ghana and usually consists of several stages before completion. So isn’t it totally ridiculous to brand it as a mere engagement?
Most traditional marriages are elaborate, expensive and a big show of culture with a reception, favors, gifts, pastors and so much more. Why waste people’s time and money doing more of this?
As a matter of fact, the western countries have a white wedding and it ends there. The engagement occurs when the fine young man goes on his knees and says ‘my lady, will you marry me?” Full stop.
Why don’t we also choose one…black wedding, green wedding, purple or white? What exactly are we about?
Some ‘enlightened’ people actually brand the traditional ceremony as irrelevant and outmoded and a way of selling out the woman…an opinion I consider quiet a shame but I will leave that topic for another day.
Am I being rather hard on Ghana or am I just ignorant? Do you have an opinion similar to mine or different concerning this? Kindly share…