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Love & Relationship Advice: My Dad “Dislikes” Me Because I No Longer Believe In Sunday Church Services

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Hello GC,

The love I have for my dad is strong because my mum died when I was still too young to remember her. He always tells me how much I resemble her, our family even agrees with him.

As I get older, my preferences are changing, there is one change that my dad does not agree with. I no longer go to church with him and the rest of the family.

My dad has begun saying that I am no longer the daughter who is like her mother all because I don’t go to church the way she did.

One time, it got so bad that he summoned an evangelist to my apartment for prayers, I had no choice but to let them in.

How do I explain to my dad that I no longer believe in going to church on a Sunday in order to make it to Heaven?

Those hours I spent at church could be used iat work and get paid double the money and also I do worship in my own way, I listen to church services on the radio and even read scripture every so often. Please help me advice my dad.

Evelyn Kpingba

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Hello Evelyn,

I asked Chris’s permission to respond to this mail because in fact I have a connection with you. My father died when I was a teenager and there are things I do which remind my family of him.

The truth is, one can never please family all the time. You father may view your change as an affront to his person and to the memory of your mother, his wife.

Can you not see he wants you to grow to be a fine lady as he believes your late mother was. Somehow he associates your mother’s religious ways with the reason for her attributes as a woman.

Your reasoning for not going to church troubles me a little, after all, Christ himself said we should rest on the Sabbath. Perhaps you have your reasons to be a workaholic but my dear, is one day out of the week to spend with family too much to ask?

Do not look at it as “church going”, look at it as your dad feeling scared and lonely and perhaps these few hours you spend with the rest of the family brings peace of mind to him(it is something you won’t understand until you get old yourself).

Psychologists call it a comfort zone, the need to have the familiar daily routines as one gets older, I implore you to shift work hours to accommodate your father’s request to at least two Sundays a month. I am sure he will be happy with this compromise and bring both parties the desired effect.

Good Luck!

Yaa Kesiwaa

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1 thought on “Love & Relationship Advice: My Dad “Dislikes” Me Because I No Longer Believe In Sunday Church Services”

  1. The “church going” ghana lady is looked down upon by the so called “modern ghana lady” who doesn’t see the importance of worshipping. Just like some Gh ladies I know from back in Ghana but after spending some yrs in the US some of them all of a sudden have noticed they are bi sexuals… i wonder why thy didn’t see that back in ghana till they go the US. *smh*
     In this world it matters to have some form of faith… something to cling onto sometimes.

    However your father is very wrong to treat you that way. He should accept you as his daughter no matter what.

    Reply

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