Where Are All The ‘Good’ Men?

4 min


Black-Couple

 

…..Right under your nose; that is where all the good men are!! Good men are all around you but they’re hiding in the same room as you. You may consider yourself a good woman; you may even consider yourself a bad girl. I just think that most times when women say they can’t find a good man, it’s indicative of the fact that they’ve already shown the good men they aren’t worth their time. Some are not ready to get off their high horses and realise that the world does not revolve around them.

Some ladies complain about the ‘bad girls’ getting all the ‘will you marry me’ vibes so what I have noticed with some is they try their very best to pull the ‘bad girl’ look and attitude to get the men BUT it is not every man who prides himself with marrying a bad girl and some of these ‘play acting bad girls’ are losing men – and I mean good men.. The truth of the matter is (or my truth is) that good men aren’t attracted to bad women when they intend to settle down. If they’re looking for bed mates and all, yeah, the ‘bad girls’ fit in perfectly for that purpose.

It is not only ladies who act the bad girls they’re not; some men do the same. They have this general assertion that women like ‘stupid/players/jerk’ and any lady they come across, they want to act, talk and behave like one and they’re not even ‘wired’ that way. Even if the majority supposedly carries the vote, remember there is always a minority who don’t see life in black and white. Acting bad or ‘stupid’ is also pretending because a good person will not pretend (you have to be good to expect good). Allow the bad/stupid lovers to pick what they prefer and the ‘down to earth’ ones to choose what they desire.

The ‘all men cheat/sleep with anything in skirt’ chorus is a presumption that really weighs heavily on a ‘good’ man. All men do not cheat (you can agree or disagree based on personal experiences). There are some men out there who will never allow themselves to be in a relationship with someone they feel they may cheat on. The funny issue here is women are doing the cheating more than the men but because the ‘crime’ suits the men more, it looks like the ball is always in their court. So, if a woman carries this mentality of ‘all men cheat’, how are you going to get a good man…Because good men don’t cheat….!?

Sometimes the choices ladies make set them back a few steps when on the search to find a good partner. I’ll concede that there are some men out there that women are overlooking because they don’t make enough money, they’re not loud enough (I don’t mean loud in voice but one who spends the most money, wears the flashiest outfits, or generally does everything in his power to keep the spotlight on him). That to me is not a lady who is seeking for a good man; she is seeking a benefactor or a narcissist.

Some ladies have bought ‘love’ in the past so much that they’re conditioned to always give something in exchange for a man’s ‘love’. They have used incentives to drive and define past relationships and in turn have ‘taught’ others to value them for what they have and not who they are. They’re not clear on the difference between being loved for what they look like, what they can do or what they have, and being loved for who they are. Love to them can only be acquired through pleasing a man with sex, money etc. Such a lady becomes suspicious when she meets a man who loves her for who she is. They don’t know how to accept love and mess up what would have been a ‘great’ relationship with a ‘great guy’ because he’ll be fed up and write you off as hopeless, scorned or damaged.

Some ladies deceive themselves that one cannot have an attractive (subjective) as well as a good person; but you can get the whole package – looks, personality, and character. It’s not the ‘ugly’ ones who are good (don’t know where that came from) and the good looking ones are ….

Good men come in different shapes and sizes, they exhibit their goodness in different ways and individually but they all possess the same quality ‘good’. I find that the people who are lacking in one or more areas stay complaining about the lack of ‘good’ men. Before you go on a good man hunt, what is your definition of good in the first place?


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