I have a gripping tale of a boy who once got entangled with two older women at different times, and in his own words, “it wasn’t that funny.”
His story has inspired this article and by virtue of that I have tried to unravel the air of mystery that surrounds such relationships and have deeper understanding as to why men are attracted to older woman commonly referred to as cougars.
Is the love genuinely base on mutual love or it transcends that boundary?
In an earlier article I wrote entitled, “Does Age Matter in a Relationship?” I said among other things that age is just a number and that maturity and age are two different components altogether.
The stereotype has always been a constant reminder that men prefer younger partners. However over the last couple of years, backed by advancement and deliberate attempt to show equitability, women are rushing for younger me like never before. Modern women emphasis this power to demonstrate that they can have what they want at any time just like their male counterparts.
An age-gap romance is something conservative society struggle to come to terms with. The relationship at a point becomes fragile when there is avalanche of seers and ridicule from the public. The public disapproval of this kind of relationship has been reinforced because of the existing system that makes men insusceptible to some of its ironies.
Men can date young girls who are old enough to be their daughters per convention and this ruffles no feathers. On the other hand, it becomes abnormal for a woman of about 40 plus to date a boy (herein a man between the ages of 20 to 27).
One obvious fact that forms the basis of this kind of relationship is the benefits each party stands to gain. Whiles the woman is willing to embrace life wrapped in a younger persona, the opposite cannot be said to be the same.
Financial constraints and other form of hardship have compelled younger men to seek refuge in older women at the expense of love. Most of these women who exude this allure are able to attract these ‘emotionally unstable men’ are those in the state of financial freedom, matured (not with age but the mind), a backbone career and hassle free form of life.
The boy mentioned in the first paragraph of this article (real name withheld but for the sake clarity I will use Nana Yaw) was involved with two women in 2007 and 2013. In both instances the relationship was fraught with lots of difficulties.
Nana Yaw worked at a shop at Kokomlemle close to the woman’s boutique. She was 43. She took notice of the boy and desired him earnestly. She made her feelings known to him. Nana Yaw was stunned but in order not to offend the woman, he showed no sign of disdain towards her (a feeling he haboured inside)
Eventually Nana Yaw quit the job in a deliberate attempt to avoid the woman. Unfortunately for him, the woman had already secured his cell number. She called him several times on the phone. Nana Yaw finally bowed to the pressure, partly owing to financial problems he was going through at that time.
She directed him to her plush residence at Adenta. The woman wore a hot mini skirt to meet him at the gate. She took him to the bedroom with the excuse that the TV at the living room was malfunctioning. She brought out a bottle of Cardinal Strawberry which she poured into a wine glass that contained cubes of ice. She went to the kitchen and returned with the biggest roasted chicken Nana Yaw has ever seen before and asked him to ‘devour’ everything alone.
He became intoxicated and the woman took advantage to engage him in sexual bouts which was laden with unimaginable acts that Nana Yaw says is regretful anytime he recollects.
The woman apologized profusely in the morning amidst thanking him profoundly for giving her ‘the greatest s*x of her life.’ She gave him lots of money and that was beginning of their s*x-for-money kind of relationship.
Nana Yaw said he severed the relationship because his cougar failed to fulfill the numerous promises she made to him and that all she was interested in was s*x, nothing else.
In 2013 he encountered another cougar whose primary objective was s*x. He confessed he was madly in love with the latest one and wished they could have continued the relationship but he was unable to meet her s*xual demands.
I have spoken to several other guys who are in this kind of relationship and they can’t seem to hide their happiness and contentment. They claim they are not in a relationship of convenience but mutual understanding and commitment are the factors that informed their decision.
Research says women who are 10 years or more years older than their partners report more satisfaction and relationship commitment compared to women who are the same age or younger than their partners.
Share your opinion with us of if you have a cougar, or you with a man who is substantially younger than you.