Akosua Abebrese Writes: Gifty Anti…Adorable & Empowering But Her ‘Marriage Misfortune’ is Not A Crown for Women to Wear

6 min


Gifty Anti and her soon to be husband-Nana Ansah Kwao
Gifty Anti and her soon to be husband-Nana Ansah Kwao

I have been on a mini writing hiatus because my laptop broke down, I sent it for repairs and this good for nothing repairer left Accra for Bimbila to attend his great grandfather’s funeral without telling me—and up to date, he has not shown his face in Accra.

I guess in every misfortune there is a blessing since I have gotten a new laptop—by the kind courtesy of a man who wants to have his way with me though he is married with 6 children. I have told him I am not interested in playing with his married and fatherly pot belly but if he desire to make my everyday a Christmas, I sure have enough space in my room to take in all the goodies.

And you know what, I have screenshot our conversation so that if his wife shows up at my door one day, I will gladly show her that I did all a sister should have done for her husband to leave me alone—but he didn’t and he just wanted to help solve my financial problems.

When God sends the devil, He quickly sends the angel of kindness to redeem the chaos—He sent John Mahama to us in Ghana to capsize the economy and He gladly sent this man as my one and only redeemer.

Now that I have explained myself, let me move on to the serious issue. In fact, you guys are not my editors so why did I even bother explaining to you where I have been?

Gifty Anti
Gifty Anti

Anyway, the absence of the laptop also gave me a lot of free time to experiment new things with this young guy who just moved into my area—I may share his story one day when I am done draining all his energy.

So Gifty Anti is getting married after many years of wishing and praying, though she claims she was not doing any of these things…right? We do not sleep with her so it’s only reasonable that we believe she did not really care about getting marriage as a Ghanaian woman in her mid 40s.

You must know nothing about the importance of marriage in Africa and the societal structure of Ghana to believe Gifty Anti was genuinely not worried in anyway about the non-forthcoming of marriage while her age was on a speed dial, running like Tigo credit when you call China.

I believe she was worried though she once said she was not in a hurry to get married. At 45, if she was not in a hurry to get married, how come within few months after this comment, she is getting married? If that is not HURRY, what else is then?

I think Gifty should be honest about her situation, the fears that came with it and help others find solace in what has finally found her—but she seems to brush it off, saying, marriage has never been a big deal for her.

Don’t get me wrong, I adore Gifty Anti and I am happy that finally she is going to have a man she can look in the faces of all the haters and proudly say, he is MINE. Though it should not be so, husbands are the pride of most African woman—and our culture places huge significance on this.

But my problem lies in the conversation developing on the back of Gifty Anti’s situation—with women saying, marriage does not really matter and even at 45 you can still get married. So a woman should not work towards getting married at a reasonable age. This is where they cite Gifty Anti…

Look, that is plain BS out there—Gifty Anti’s case should be the exception and it should not to be celebrated. Her misfortune should be regarded as so and we should be happy that things have turned around for her but we should not term this a heroic enterprise by saying, women shouldn’t worry when the marriage is taking donkey years to show its head.

That’s some lame deduction out there; because a woman has a biological clock and with procreation being a primary purpose of marriage, there is time boundary for every woman to seek this or to make it happen.

I know God is the one who gives children but He is also the one who instituted the biological clock—at 45 and over, it is not only likely impossible to have children but even if it happens, there is a high possibility of health complications.

So as much as we want to celebrate Gifty Anti for her excellence and women empowerment, we should be bold and wise enough to jilt the aspect of her life which is not worth emulating or wishing for.

Surely, I will be the last woman to advocate for desperation and adopting all means necessary to get married. However, the truth stands–which is, marriage is an important pillar in our society and a certain age range remains the reasonable time to get it done.

If you are between 25-37, that’s the time to have this done—anything above 37 is an exception which we should not condemn but we should not also in anyway accept that as a piece worth being taught to those tailing us.

We can sincerely look at the achievements of Gifty Anti and come to realize that marriage is not the defining factor in a woman’s life but I bet she wishes this marriage came way earlier—and not now that she is 45 years old.

I am certain she wouldn’t advise any woman to wait till 45 before getting married—so all of you women taking refuge in her misfortune as though it’s a crown have to re-evaluate the problem.

You can adore Gifty Anti all you want but don’t deceive yourself into thinking that, 45 is the best time for a woman to get married. And I will be mad if she ever suggests so…

If you missed my previous articles, CLICK HERE for them.

Akosua-Abebrese1

Writer’s Email: [email protected]


24 Comments

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  1. Welcome back Akosua, I miss your excellent piece. This is another brilliant on. Yes Gifty Anti is pretending a lot giving women a bad vibe. We all want to marry and if yours took too long, at least say the truth and share your experience, don’t make it seem you really didn’t care

  2. Akosua Abebrese well said. The woman has done a lot of good but the way people are making it seem it is cool to be marrying at 45 and therefore she has done something great is scary for me too. My own cousin mentioned this a few days ago that even Gifty Anti is now marrying and there is nothing wrong for a woman to want to have things in her own time as if it was her choice. We need to see things for what they are, simple

    1. Well, from my own experience knowledge changes the way we think and see things. Marriage is good in our society but its not a must. Not all women see marriage as a priority in life. So if someone doesn’t see it how we see it, it’s either the person is lying or not honest. Leave that to God to judge. There are several times women of today decide on weda to get married or not due to what they want in marriage or not. Its over to the person to describe his or her state of loneliness and to access weda he or she is going to find it in a person or not. Pls leave this woman alone. Everybody is wise enough to make their own decisions.

      1. ????I applaud you for your comment. Not everyone sees it as a priority. Some get married at an early age, divorce and vow never to get married….others stay in abusive marriages, some rush into it and regret it, others have been married and lived happily. Everyone got their own destiny and life to live. Its 2015 people, lets educate ourselves. Whats good for u doesn’t mean its good for someone else. We all got different stories to write…

      2. I don’t understand your comment, Are you telling me Gifty Anti planned to get married at 45? What for and have kids at what age? You are confusing me about choice and when something is not by choice.

        From my understanding of this article, the writer seems to say Gifty Anti should not let it sound her getting married at 45 is by choice. It is a lie and she should be honest. That where I agree.

        I also agree that Gifty’s predicament should not be used by women who want to get marriage as a comfort zone to say Gifty got married at 45 so it is cool. That is not the reality of her situation, it was not by choice.

        1. How do you know it’s a lie? Are you her friend? Did she tell you this or you are just assuming? Pls even someone gets marries at 50, she doesn’t need your approval.It could be choice or other reasons like heart breaks…etc.And it is not a predicament!!.. Stop this pls or do you have a personal issue with her? Let’s stop the assumptions pls.

  3. Interesting….lots of people don’t know what life is about!…..dear writer u seem to have lots of growing up to do before commenting on other people’s lives

    1. Exactly.first sensible comment I have read here.I pray that the writer gets married early, I pray she never suffers any delays….I pray hard cos until you wear the shoe, you can’t tell where it pinches.

  4. Accepting gifts from a married man who is obviously after you is also not mature attitude either nor anything to proudly discuss.

    1. Tell her pls.Miss Akosua goody two shoes writing with a laptop you swindled out of a married man and proudly declaring it to the world…. You…pointing fingers at Gifty!! Like seriously? Come back when you grow up and write good articles rather than trying to imitate Vincent in order to please him.

  5. I am shocked to say the least.Has God gone on recess and given you the power to judge others? This article is so wrong!!! There are ladies who get married in their early 20s and cannot conceive.its not about age.Even 70 year old women can give birth these days thanks to advancement in medicine( google is your friend).
    I also know that ladies( Africans especially)do not like to stay late before getting married.Lots of factors can delay a woman’ s marriage.She had a right to say she was not under pressure to marry when asked earlier this year because she is entitled to her privacy and as almost all celebrities do,she decided to hide her personal life from the public.Yhe relationship is 3 yrs plus.pls if you don’t have articles to write, wait for another day.there are older women in different sectors in Ghana…why single Gifty out and talk trash
    When did mawuena dumor marry?( no pun intended) go to metro TV, go to tv3.pls am really upset.this is wrong. I think its because of people like you that God blessed her with royalty for a husband.i don’t know Gifty from Adam but I watch her on TV and I think that if you can’t rejoice with her at least dont be a kill joy.if you like don’t post my comment.I leave you to your conscience.

    1. This article needs to be deleted asap. I find it very rude and insulting. Who is she to say all these crap to the woman? Am so pissed too…what happened to God’s appropriate time for others? You cant go wrong with God’s given time and am beginning to think this small kid doesn’t know what marriage is all about.

      1. So an article needs to be deleted because you don’t like? Are you Chris’ father or mother. GC readers can make me laugh

  6. Well just before I start, I think I’ll take just a minute or two to inform madam AA (Akosua abebrese) that if her AWOL (abscense without leave) was only occasioned by her PC repairer’s lousiness & his apparent failure in returning her PC at the agreed time & that’s why she needed another woman’s husband just to assist her with a PC then I guess her solution was far fetched as I’m single & also a young adult at the age of 29 & would have provided her with a durable laptop cause I have a few old ones that are still in good condition packed somewhere in my archives & of no real use to me thus I could’ve given her one to use as a stop-gap while awaiting the return of her own PC from that lousy repairer … I’m surprised you actually went that far for a PC – only God knows what you’re going to offer a man who promises you a new car/ house … Hmmm only God knows!

    Now moving on to the substantive matter …oh so now the great Gifty is finally getting married ! Oseyeey!

    Now where are the Lydia Forson’s, Yvonne Nelson’s & all the other resilient feminist … So now your boss has thrown in her towel … I bet you guys especially Lydia forson will start thinking twice …& just like an adage in twi states ; if you purport to be overly sensible – you start greeting goats just to show how courteous you are! So y’all young ladies out there that are so disrespectful … The earlier you realize that the society we live in is a patriarch one – the better it would be for you & your future!

    Well for me I have just one or two questions to ask ; we a know gifty’s age is 45 .. So how old is the man ? Has he ever been married ? Foes he have kids from a previous marriage or is he as “virginlike” as his new wife! If he had kids with a previous wife who is either late or had been divorced then Gifty has to be prepared not only to please the man but also the kids who’s love for their mum won’t disappear overnight simply because their dad is married to a Tv personality!

    I wish Gifty the very best on her new journey .. But you see my advise to her is not to allow herself to be carried away by all of the excitement this is the time for her to reflect soberly .. & for her to understand very clearly that in the institution of marriage the man is the head & that is non negotiable… It is a call to serve her husband & prospective children … So her butch disposition must be relegated to the back burner … & she must begin to show some submissiveness which is indeed the only true way for her marriage to stand the test of time

    I used to an ardent viewer of her award winning program the stand point I stopped watching simply because at some point the show seemed to be a platform that gave space to insolent & self centered single women to throw unwarranted jabs at men .. I recall clearly that on one of episodes the then Ursula owusu now Ursula akkuful who’s also married now actually referred to men who made sexual advances towards women as dogs … Oh so now the great Gifty & Ursula are also married to the same ” dogs” ..hmmm asem be ba dabi!

    So just before I go … All those self acclaimed career women .. Who treat men with utmost contempt please remember that even your mentors & role models in that venture have now backtracked & eaten a humble pie .. A word to a wise is always in the north … Hahaha

  7. Marriage is not for boys and girls it is for mature people. In His time He makes all things beautiful, God has a plan and purpose for everyone…..Congrats Aunty Gifty

  8. This article is complete nonsense. And people like this writer are those who push young women to endure abusive relationship especially when the so-called age limit is ticking. By the way, who said one can only hav kids through marriage, if the only reason is procreation? Some women are are better off single and should be allowed to make such choices. i dont even understand the brouhaha aba Gifty. Is she the only woman to marry late in Ghana. Please leave her alone to enjoy her union.

  9. Miss Akosua….most women would love to be married in their early twenties and thirties, and I know Miss Gifty would have wanted that too, however a woman can’t force a man to marry her or propose marriage to a man, especially in Ghana….Gifty never ruled out marriage -but in her case it took, her sometime…I don’t think anybody will advocate that women, should wait till age 45 years before they get married…In terms of having children , Miss Anti is a foster mother and a mentor to a lot of children especially young women and plus I believe Nana Ansa Kwaw has children or a child, so she could be a step-mother. Although…i understand that the older, you get the more difficult it becomes for you to have children, Gifty can give it a try, if only she wants to….plus i’ve seen young mothers who have also had issues with pregnancy and childbirth. We can’t predict things in life. until then Mrs Sintim Misa should be left alone, to enjoy her marriage…..At lest Gifty’s marriage gives hope to all the women of a particular age who want to get married.