This societal urge to blame every failed relationship on women is so strong, but its something that must be eschewed in this 21st century of enlightenment.
In the past, many of our elders have been forced to remain in abusive relationships because of fear of what they would go through if they leave, even from trusted family members and friends who would mostly rush to blame them for not trying hard enough.
Yet every relationship is a two-way street and both parties must share blame for however it ends.
Gospel singer Empress Gifty, who recently got married to Hopeson Adorye, her second marriage, has said a lot about the suffering she had to endure following the collapse of her first marriage.
According to her, everyone turned on her and blamed her, even those who knew what happened and whom she expected to take her side.
“The people around me were laughing at me, so, at that point, I didn’t know whom to go to and whom to trust again. I was not even trusting myself. Why should I share my problems with someone and they will sit at home discussing it and laughing at me?” she revealed on Accra Fm.
“People I trusted were saying that: ‘Her husband has left her and we will see how she will survive’. These were things I heard and even the pastor I thought could help me in my difficulty, rejected me, as well as my friends to the point that I found it difficult to even go to the salon. It was so difficult for me to go to church.”
According to Gifty, even during her marriage she was betrayed by friends, some of whom she told her issues to but they then repeated it to others whilst adding their own spin.
“The same people with whom I shared my problem with, and thought were my friends and family in the gospel industry, contributed to the collapse of my marriage and I felt so sorry for myself when I eventually found out.
“I knew I had betrayed myself because after each conversation, those people I shared my problems with, added their own version to the conversation and presented it to others elsewhere.” she said.
Gifty said she got so miserable she nearly committed suicide until she was actually ‘saved’ by her new relationship.