Counsellor Adofoli is one counsellor who is attaining some level of fame in the media in recent times. However, unlike his ‘counterpart’ Lutterodt, Adofoli is not known for making outrageous statements for attention but trying to delve into relationship issues.
Adofoli, in a new post, says Ghanaian men find it difficult to connect with women because they erroneously believe that the only way to connect with a woman is through giving her money.
According to Adofoli, women are far more complex than that and need more than money to be happy in a relationship.
Apparently, he hasn’t met the slay queen generation of today, who are quite happy to kick a man to the curb if he cannot give them the cash they need; but for more grounded, traditional women, a lot of what Adofoli claims makes sense.
Read his latest relationship advice below…
Sometimes women are seen as complicated by men, so difficult to understand them. Even when they know all the truth of their cheating, they still want him to confess before they act. Even when the man who loves her professes it, she still asks the man whether he loves her.
When their men give them their words like “I won’t leave you”, she still goes ahead to ask if he is sure of that. Many men feel irritated by that, a lot get angry whilst others conclude women are hard to love or understand.
Many men think the only language a woman best understands, believes and doesn’t question or doubt is when you give her money. Money cannot buy her understanding. Although it has the power to keep her silent or busy or put a smile on their face, that is not enough.
Women are not complicated as men think, women just need to know their men truly care for them. So when you tell her you love her, despite your kind gesture etc. as time goes on, she would like to find out if you still love her and that nothing has changed. It does not mean you never loved her, it never means she has found someone else, it doesn’t mean she doubts your love. She just wants to confirm you have not changed.
Instead of getting angry, shouting on her or telling her not to ask you that again like some men do, take your time to confirm your love for her. If she asks a hundred times, you answer her a hundred times. You don’t get angry or tired of her. It goes a long way to confirm your love for her.
If she offended you and pled for forgiveness, of which you have forgiven her, but asks again if you have forgiven her, don’t get mad. If she asked that a hundred times, let her know you have forgiven her. That will put her mind to rest, give her peace of mind and peace at heart.
If she asks whether you have any plans of marrying her or if you will marry her, which you do have plans in place, It is a perfect opportunity to let her know your plans. It doesn’t matter the number of times she asked that. You don’t get angry or see that as pressure being put on you.
The truth is, many people are not real, they make fake promises which they don’t intend to keep. For her to be sure you are not lying to her or leading her on, she will keep asking you the same question over and over again.
Your actions might be real and genuine but you still need to confirm by your words. Your confirmation makes her trust you more, believe you and submit to you. That is why without a proposal it is hard for her to see you as her lover.
Again, she does not want just a proposal or a promise of marriage, but someone who won’t leave her after marriage. She is not looking for someone who promises her the moon and stars, but someone who will lay down on the grass to watch them with her.
She is not looking for someone who buys her a phone but someone who will make time to talk with her on the phone. She is not looking for someone who takes her home, but someone who stays at home with her. She wants a life with you and because of that, she constantly wants to know you are with her, that you still care about her, and she still means something to you.
In conclusion, “A good man hates lies; wicked men lie constantly and come to shame” – Proverbs 13:5 (TLB).