What’s more important when choosing a spouse, particularly as a lady in a part of the world where men are expected to shoulder most of the burden of taking care of the house – is it about what they have now or what they could potentially have in the future?
Since no one can see the future, isn’t betting on ‘future potential’ too risky? But then an aimless or unambitious man who has a little bit of money today is not guaranteed to have that same wealth tomorrow.
Whilst it might look like a complicated decision, Founding Editor of GhanaCelebrities.Com, Chris-Vincent Agyapong, argues its a really straightforward proposition.
In a post on Facebook, Chris said what a man can become in future should be more important than what he has now but many Ghanaian/African ladies do not know that.
“…When deciding on a partner for a long time, I believe our women should place more value on the future potential of a man, as opposed to what they just see in front of them now,” Chris wrote.
“Don’t get burnt as a woman by meeting a man you had a chance with many years ago but failed to explore it because you were fixed on the then, and not the future.”
Read his full post below…
Every smart guy would have now recognised this deficiency in the thinking and decision-making prowess of a lot of women of our generation.
What I am going to tell you is the truth, and even after reading this, a lot of women will still ignore it. The men will have the final laugh.
We have something called instant gratification, which means, getting a reward immediately or in other words, looking at what will be obtained now and relying on that to make a decision that runs into the future.
A lot of women I have met in life fail to consider the most important thing about a man, even when they want to spend a long time with him. And this thing is, considering the person’s “future prospect”.
If an African woman meets two men—one with a car and some small money to spend on her today but with no concrete future plans. The second, pursuing his education and very ambitious in life.
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Most likely, the woman will choose the first one—because of the instant gratification deficiency.
If you give these two men and the woman a few years, the second man would likely overtake the first man—with the woman beginning to think, what happened?
I have seen this numerous times for it to be any sort of coincidence. That is a fact of life.
Ideally, the person who is focusing of his future, the most ambitious person at the table is the most valuable person. But to a lot of women, the one with the cash today, even if the future looks cloudy, is the most valuable.
I am sure several men today will laugh at the women who chose other men over them, because, they didn’t have liquid cash back then but had valuable unappreciated assets of ambition and great prospects.
But then, a few women have argued in relation to this topic that, sometimes if you rely on a man’s future to be with him today and even struggle with him into that future, he ends up dropping your butt when the big future arrives.
So what then is the point? Why don’t you pick the one who can provide today and take your chances on the future with him as the other with nothing to offer today may still not enjoy the better future with you?
That’s valid and somewhat scary. But at least, when deciding on a partner for a long time, I believe our women should place more value on the future potential of a man, as opposed to what they just see in front of them now.
Don’t get burnt as a woman by meeting a man you had a chance with many years ago but failed to explore it because you were fixed on the then, and not the future.
If you are a man reading this and a lot of women wouldn’t squeeze a bit about how better you have become today, then you need to double up.
What’s been your experience?
—Chris-Vincent Agyapong
Source: GhanaCelebrities.Com