Ever heard some ‘classic’ comments from some men as ‘….If it had been another woman, she will be gleaming with pride right now….’, ‘Is that not what you women like’, ‘women want men to buy them groceries…’, ‘buy her a weave and you’re set to go’ and so on and so forth.

Some men have written their own ‘what EVERY woman love 101’ because to them every woman is the same. Every woman they relate with they treat them the same because that is how they also go about their ‘relationships’ and in their journey so far, they haven’t or yet to meet one that is different – but what they do forget is that every woman is an individual and must be treated as such – individually. Same goes with women towards men (that is for another day). I suppose on some level it’s something to do with not understanding enough and making rash assumptions—-and we don’t even have that time to learn who people are.

When you look at ‘all women are the same’ generalization, most of the time, it doesn’t work in the men’s favour because you’re trying to please someone who it doesn’t even take much to please. If a man thinks ALL women like designer stuff, shopping etc. and that is the main reason why women go after men; if you a guy who can barely afford high street and you decide to use all your life savings to buy a designer bag for a woman because of the above assumption, hmm, some wires need checking. Who will refuse a good designer bag when offered? I won’t even if I know you paid with your last dime. After all, I’m a woman and I’m ALL……

We are women, yes, but we are individuals; we are not all the same. What will trigger my madness will trigger a laugh from someone, what another woman will call the biggest treat may be nothing to me because anything I can comfortably afford myself is not the ‘biggest’ treat and what I’ll call splendid, another will say it’s OK. We have different traits, different upbringing, different way of carrying ourselves and different ways of how we value life and ‘things’, not forgetting how we manage our individual lives. You can’t brush every woman with the same brush.

That is why we all have standards, individual choice, values and options. If you’re not used to some categories of people who don’t fit into your standard, don’t try to mould them to fit into your standard because if you’re not ready to let go or lower your standard for anyone, then you don’t expect anyone to do same for you – unless the person cannot tell her left from her right. A woman not doing what you’re used to doesn’t make her weird – that is how she is; take it or leave it.

An advice a friend of mine gave me which I’m holding on tight is ‘…., don’t say all men are the same or treat all men you come across the same because you will lose a good thing. We human beings are a mystery; unfold men to know who/what they are. If they unfold themselves and it’s the same you’ve (always) seen, you are right to categorise them as the same but until then, you don’t know who he is….’

There are a billion and one girls everywhere, you can still find who you’re ‘used’ to among the lot but until then not all women are the same. You treat any woman you come across as an individual not as ‘business as usual’ even if the majority you associate with/have associated with in the past have the same modus operandi.

As my friend said, you may lose a good one with that mind-set of categorising all women the same. But if you do come across one whose way of life is different from what you’re accustomed to, does it not make the person more interesting? If you’re talking boob and the down below, yeah we all have it, but definitely different because my boobs are very small and others have big ones….

Unravel the mystery of women individually; it may be worth it!