It is no surprise that most of us live our lives without being completely honest with ourselves. We often try to hide who we truly are by trying to be normal, fit in with the crowd and self-sabotage ourselves through addictions and other behaviours that don’t get us what we truly want. To be honest with others about who we are and what we want, we must first be honest with ourselves. Saying yes to everything to everyone even though you sometimes feel like (want to) saying no is part of being dishonest with yourself. When you’re doing something for someone and complaining/grunting/moaning about it, there’s no happiness in what you’re doing for the person.
Being in relationships we REALLY don’t want to be or we’re very much aware (sometimes in deed/words) the other person is taking us nowhere is another way we blatantly lie to ourselves. Some of us ladies tend to lie to ourselves so much it becomes part of us. After years of courting/dating, when a lady is not getting the response she expects from the guy when the issue of marriage is mentioned, I think she should start advising herself with the truth. When a guy keeps giving excuses here and there, chances are – you’re not his type for marriage.
If he thinks you have that something unique which he’s looking out for in a life partner, he’s definitely not going to give all the excuses in the world if he doesn’t want to lose the rare gem that you are. Don’t deceive yourself by making excuses for him and stay there for years on end; whiles he is searching (without your knowledge). Sometimes after getting tired of searching, in rare circumstances, he decides to make do with you because you are available. What he thought you lacked in the first place still holds – if you are what he is looking for, he won’t overlook and search in the first place. Tell yourself the truth. Nobody strings anybody along – it takes two to tango. Have enough self-respect and tell yourself ‘I’m not getting what I want and I don’t want to/ won’t be able to settle’.